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Signs of Self-Destructive Habits & Thoughts in Teens

Recognizing the warning signs of self-sabotaging behavior in teens can make all the difference in their emotional well-being. Empower yourself to recognize and address the hidden struggles your teen might be facing.

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Is your teenager showing concerning changes in behavior? As a parent, you have the power to make a life-changing difference by recognizing early warning signs of emotional distress. When you notice shifts in mood, withdrawal from family and friends, or declining interest in activities they once enjoyed, your teen may be silently struggling.

If you suspect your teen is struggling with substance misuse or mental health issues, Guardian Recovery can help. As specialists in teen treatment, we offer multiple levels of care as well as family integration and academic support to help get your teen and your family back on track.

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Guardian Recovery Adolescent can help your teen take control of their lives, putting them on a path to a brighter future filled with possibility.

Recognizing Signs of Self-Sabotaging Behaviors 

While any behavior that seems out of the norm should be evaluated, some behaviors often indicate the teen is self-sabotaging. 

  • Avoiding or Procrastinating Responsibilities: This involves delaying or not completing important tasks, such as homework or chores. In addition, teens may skip school and avoid making plans for their future. 
  • Negative Self-Talk: This consists of saying or thinking negative statements about oneself. Those struggling with negative self-talk often lack confidence in their abilities, which, in turn, hinders their efforts or goals. 
  • Impulsive or Risky Behaviors: Acting impulsively or engaging in actions like skipping class, experimenting with substances, or reckless behavior can derail a teen’s success. 
  • Perfectionism or Fear of Failure: There is a difference between striving to excel and being perfectionistic. Some teens set the standards for themselves unrealistically high, which leads to a fear of failure. Consequently, they freeze up and avoid moving forward because they feel they won’t meet their own expectations. 
  • Withdrawal and Self-Isolation: When teens withdraw from the activities they usually enjoy or pull away from their support network, they set themselves up for difficulties. This is another sign of self-sabotage.  

Daily Actions That May Signal Internal Struggles 

Observe your teen’s daily behavior for signs they may be struggling internally. Some of the signs include:

  • Disruption in Sleep Patterns: This could include sleeping too much or too little or staying up all night or napping often during the day. Teens may complain of insomnia and fatigue. 
  • Significant Changes in Appetite or Eating Habits: Some teens eat much more or less than normal when self-sabotaging. You might notice a sudden change in weight. 
  • Irritability or Emotional Outbursts: Teens may experience a wide range of moods, swinging from anger to frustration over minor issues. They may also be more sensitive than normal.
  • Not Keeping up with Academic or Daily Responsibilities: This includes not taking care of personal hygiene and/or neglecting homework and chores. 
  • A Decline in Social Interactions and Activities: Teens may not associate with friends or family but instead spend excessive time alone. They are also uninterested in participating in activities as before. 

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High-Risk Thought Patterns & Warning Signals 

In order for parents to intervene in a timely manner, they must be aware of high-risk thought patterns and warning signs. Some of these include: 

  • All-or-Nothing Thought Patterns: Teens may have a world perspective that is extreme. Everything is viewed through the lens of black and white or all or nothing. They leave no room for middle-of-the-road thinking. They may feel that if something isn’t perfect, then it’s a failure. This type of thinking can lead to teens giving up quickly. 
  • Negative Self-Talk: When negative self-talk is present, persistent criticism rules the teen’s internal dialogue. Phrases such as “I always mess up,” or “I’m not good enough” tear down confidence. 
  • Blaming Thought Patterns: Blaming others or circumstances deflects any personal responsibility, making it difficult to learn, grow, and change. 
  • Perfectionistic Thinking: Having unrealistic expectations in oneself can lead to falling short. Perfectionism may be disguised as striving for excellence but there is a subtle difference. With perfectionism, the person sets standards that can’t be met. 

Identifying Dangerous Mental Health Red Flags in Your Teen 

Recognizing mental health red flags can help parents find an appropriate treatment program. Mental health red flags indicate that there is likely something going on that needs attention. Red flags could include things like hopelessness, moodiness, withdrawal, changes in behavior, and risk taking. 

Taking Immediate Action When You Notice Self-Harm Risks 

If you notice your teen is exhibiting signs that they may self-harm, it’s vital to take immediate action. You don’t want to delay because the situation could escalate to something serious. Never take red flags lightly. Parents can respond in any or all of the following ways: 

  • Start a Supportive Conversation: Talking might be a good first step with a teen who appears to be struggling. However, keep in mind that you should approach the teen calmly and from a position of non-judgment. Allow space for the teen to open up. Be sure to validate their feelings.  
  • Make Sure the Environment is Safe: Remove any items that could pose a risk to the teen. Make sure they don’t have access to things like knives, guns, or medications. This can help reduce risks that might arise if the teen acts impulsively. 
  • Seek Professional Help: Your teen will benefit from the expert services of mental health professionals. If your child is engaging in substance use, an addiction treatment center is a good option. Facilities such as Guardian Recovery often offer dual diagnosis treatment to address both mental health and substance use disorders concurrently.

Implementing Emergency Response Plans That Work 

You never know when your teen might need immediate help. So it’s best to have an emergency response plan in place so that you aren’t caught unprepared. Your plan may include steps like:  

  • Assess the level of immediate risk  
  • Take action to ensure safety 
  • Remain calm 
  • Listen compassionately 
  • Use supportive language 
  • Contact emergency services if necessary 
  • Show empathy 
  • Avoid blaming 
  • Stay present 
  • Seek professional help 

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Seeking Professional Mental Health Help for Your Teen 

If you recognize any of the red flags of self-destructive behavior in your teen, help is only a phone call away. Guardian Recovery can answer your questions, discuss treatment options, and even verify your insurance or discuss alternative payment options. In addition, if Guardian Recovery seems like a good fit for you and your teen, staff can offer an initial assessment to help you determine which level of care might be the best place to start. The call is free and confidential, and you’re under no obligation to enter treatment with us.

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Disclaimer: Does not guarantee specific treatment outcomes, as individual results may vary. Our services are not a substitute for professional medical advice or diagnosis; please consult a qualified healthcare provider for such matters.

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Reviewed professionally for accuracy by:

Ryan Soave

L.M.H.C.

Ryan Soave brings deep experience as a Licensed Mental Health Counselor, certified trauma therapist, program developer, and research consultant for Huberman Lab at Stanford University Department of Neurobiology. Post-graduation from Wake Forest University, Ryan quickly discovered his acumen for the business world. After almost a decade of successful entrepreneurship and world traveling, he encountered a wave of personal and spiritual challenges; he felt a calling for something more. Ryan returned to school and completed his Master’s Degree in Mental Health Counseling. When he started working with those suffering from addiction and PTSD, he found his passion. He has never looked back.

Written by:

Picture of Sherilyn Moore

Sherilyn Moore

Sherilyn Moore is a freelance writer with over 10 years of experience. She has concurrent bachelor’s degrees in English and Communications, and she has a demonstrated history of writing for a range of industries, including hundreds of articles about substance use disorders.

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The information provided on this website is intended solely for educational and informational purposes. Guardian Recovery aims to improve the quality of life for individuals struggling with substance use or mental health disorders by offering fact-based content about behavioral health conditions, treatment options, and related outcomes. However, this information should not be considered a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

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